1.
兔子和熊在森林里遇到了灯神,说可以分别满足它们的三个愿望
熊说:"我要变得更强壮"
兔子说:"我要一个安全帽"
熊说:"我要让所有母熊都为我着迷"
兔子说:"我要一个摩托车"
熊说:"我要全世界除了我以外的公熊变成美丽的母熊"
兔子戴上安全帽,骑上摩托车说"让这只熊变成gay"
然后就跑了
熊说:"我要变得更强壮"
兔子说:"我要一个安全帽"
熊说:"我要让所有母熊都为我着迷"
兔子说:"我要一个摩托车"
熊说:"我要全世界除了我以外的公熊变成美丽的母熊"
兔子戴上安全帽,骑上摩托车说"让这只熊变成gay"
然后就跑了
2.
一犯人被执行枪决,由于子弹是河南生产的,质量不好,第一枪没放出,接着又放了第二枪...第三枪...这时犯人哭了:大哥你掐死我吧,太他妈吓人了!
3.
一北京人对河南人道:北京浪大水深，但咱还行,一百万没有办不成的事。河南人谦逊道:给你一千万办件小事把俺爹照片挂天安门上怎么样?
4.
一个男人去看心理医生
经过检测,心理医生很严肃的告诉他
有一个好消息和一个坏消息
你先听哪一个
那人想想说,先听坏消息吧
心理医生说,经过严格的检测,你的确是个同性恋
那人问,那好消息呢
医生突然低下头,腼腆的笑了,说,我觉得你长的好帅
经过检测,心理医生很严肃的告诉他
有一个好消息和一个坏消息
你先听哪一个
那人想想说,先听坏消息吧
心理医生说,经过严格的检测,你的确是个同性恋
那人问,那好消息呢
医生突然低下头,腼腆的笑了,说,我觉得你长的好帅
5.
A man dies and goes to Hell. The devil greets him, "You may choose which room you wish to enter. Whichever you choose, the person in that room will switch with you. They'll go to heaven and you'll take over until somebody switches with you. So go on, pick a room."
The devil leads him to the first room where someone is tied to a wall and is being whipped. The second room has someone being burned by a torch. The third has a man getting blown by a naked woman.
"I choose this room!" the man says.
"Very well," the devil says. He walks up to the woman and taps her on the shoulder.
"You can go now. I've found your replacement."
The devil leads him to the first room where someone is tied to a wall and is being whipped. The second room has someone being burned by a torch. The third has a man getting blown by a naked woman.
"I choose this room!" the man says.
"Very well," the devil says. He walks up to the woman and taps her on the shoulder.
"You can go now. I've found your replacement."
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